What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

What was the first Native American tribe to inhabit Long Island, NY?

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

What is the dirtiest city in India?

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

What is one fantasy you have never told anyone about but really want to do?

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

How do I stop having work crushes because I only keep getting disappointed almost every day as I keep seeing they don’t like me back and won’t ever ask me out?

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

There is any scientific evidence that we live in a sphere. Why do others say that we lives in a flat Earth but there is no evidence that they have proven the existence of a flat earth?

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Make Nazis afraid again!

What is the most heartbreaking thing your child has told you?

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Who are the archers in Genesis 49:23?

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

What are the strangest parts of The Bible?

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

TEXT:

How old is planet Earth? Is it 4.5 billion years old or 6,000 years old?

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Do people have to be a pastor to baptize?

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

What are the best ways to treat seasonal allergies?

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.